The tragic school shooting that occurred at the Vladislav Ribnikar Model Elementary School in Belgrade, Serbia on May 3, 2023 has sent shockwaves around the world. As parents, it is natural to feel shaken and concerned for the safety of our own children in the wake of such senseless violence. While we cannot always prevent horrific events like this, there are some practical steps we can take to help safeguard our kids and process these distressing incidents in a healthy way.
Talk About The Tragedy Openly
When a traumatic event happens, it is important not to shy away from discussing it with our children. Even young kids will likely hear about a shooting on the news or from friends, which can leave them feeling confused and insecure if we don’t properly address it. Gently raising the topic and asking them what they know allows us to clear up any misconceptions, answer their questions honestly, and reassure them they are safe. We can emphasize that incidents like this are extremely rare, while validating their feelings.
Limit Exposure To Media Coverage
Constant media coverage surrounding traumatic events can heighten fear and anxiety. Try to avoid leaving the TV on or checking the news excessively when kids are present. For older children, you may want to watch a single news report together and then switch the channel, using it as a chance to talk through their concerns. Monitoring their social media is also prudent to limit re-exposure.
Maintain Normal Routines
Sticking to regular schedules provides comfort through the familiar. Ensure your child attends school as usual and participates in their typical activities. Of course, allow them to talk through worries before sending them in, and remain understanding if they need extra affection or support. A return to “normal life” routines demonstrates the shooting was an isolated event.
Bolster Security Discussions
Sadly, school shootings can erode our sense of safety. Have updated conversations about your family’s emergency plans and what kids should do in threatening situations at school. Review basic lockdown or shelter-in-place protocols, assuring them that teachers will protect them. Quell any exaggerated fears while empowering them to take actions that make them feel safer.
Be Hyper-Aware Of Danger Signs
While most kids express healthy curiosity and concern after such an event, some may develop PTSD symptoms like hypervigilance regarding safety or excessive fear showing up months later. Watch for any notable changes in behaviors, eating and sleeping habits, or social tendencies that could indicate counseling is needed to overcome trauma.
Manage Your Own Anxieties
Children perceptively pick up on our stress. While this shooting is profoundly upsetting, do your best not to catastrophize or express uncontrolled anxiety in front of kids. Have honest conversations with other parents, contact counselors if needed, and limit secondary trauma from news overexposure. Perform regular self-care to manage your own emotions.
Provide Extra Comfort
In the aftermath of violence, children naturally need extra reassurance from caretakers that they are cherished and secure. Make time for uplifting family activities, give plenty of hugs, have relaxing dinners together, read comforting books before bed, and offer frequent encouragement. Your stability and warmth will help counter their distress.
Dealing with the emotional aftermath of tragedy is never easy, particularly when our innocent children are impacted. Following healthy communication approaches that help kids feel informed, secure and empowered, while also taking care of yourself, can aid families in navigating this difficult time with compassion and resilience. By supporting each other through the pain, we can uplift our communities and emerge stronger.
How To Support Your Child’s Mental Health After A School Tragedy
The shocking school shooting in Serbia is a nightmare scenario for students everywhere. While we all hope our own children never face such an event, it has undoubtedly shaken many kids’ sense of security. As parents, our job is to help restore our children’s trust, process their emotions, and equip them with coping strategies to overcome trauma. Here are some tips:
Allow Them To Open Up
Don’t force your child to discuss their feelings before they are ready. Instead, create opportunities where they feel comfortable doing so – during drives, while cooking dinner, etc. Ask open-ended questions and follow their lead. Even older kids need help verbalizing fears. Never minimize their distress.
Watch For Warning Signs
Trauma can emergence subtly through new anxiety, clinginess, physical complaints, anger, or sleep issues. A child too nervous to play outside or struggling with school requires support. Counseling may help sort through complex emotions.
Emphasize Control
Violence leaves kids feeling helpless. Combat this by providing age-appropriate ways they can regain control – picking which door gets locked first at home, learning self-defense, writing advocacy letters. Helplessness worsens trauma.
Limit Re-Exposure
Images and stories about shootings can be re-traumatizing. Restrict access to graphic media coverage to avoid triggering renewed fear and grief. Social media and peers spread traumatic content too.
Stick To Routines
Regular schedules and activities provide comfort. Ensure your child wakes up and goes to bed on time and attends all their normal practices and classes. Withdrawal is common after crises, but routines counter that.
Address Immediate Fears
Answer concrete concerns directly – school lockdown procedures, likelihood of another shooting, etc. Having up-to-date safety information helps minimize fearful fantasies.
By instilling coping techniques and closely attending to your child’s specific needs in the aftermath of crisis, you can help counteract trauma and restore their sense of security. Your compassionate presence alone comforts kids immensely.
